...so i touched it.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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