He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
