You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
