does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
So apparently I’m into choking now
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
