Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize