Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize
