I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
