I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
