If i come over, it means nothing
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize