I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Pooping to opera.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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