Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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