Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
