just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
My breasts were aching with rage.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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