That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize