I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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