Swine flu. Run for my life!
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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