You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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