I am puke
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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