we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
