I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
