i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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