Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
only if we run a train.
done.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize