Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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