Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Randomize
