This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
