Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
