it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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