Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
