why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize