To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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