He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
