Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize