So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
