Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
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