Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
