i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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