He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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