He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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