You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
