So drunk its hurt
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
