I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
