Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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