I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
