This girl is more easily done than said...
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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