just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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