...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
