It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I AM VODKA MAN
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize