well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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