I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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