I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
my shit smells like andre
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
bring money and cleavage
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
