i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize