Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
